Obviously for a few days i have been in mourning after the devastating event last Sunday (also known as the colts essentially only PLAYIN playin for the first quarter of the superbowl which resulted in the Saints walked away being the champions. Dont get me wrong..im not tryin to downplay the Saints talent bc they r a great team and when credit is due it must be given..BUT i DO think the end result would've been different if the colts would've actually played the whole game). ANYHOOTS...i never abandoned my love and fidelity to the colts but i def was in mourning...I am feeling the love tho again...love for the Saints for playin their hearts out and love for my colts even tho they really disappointed me to the point where i think i deserve a PERSONAL apology.
Another love circulating in the air around here is love for my body/health! And for reese's too! We are really taking some serious steps to start living healthier lives. We've never been terribly unhealthy buuuuuuuut we def have had some serious room for improvement. We've really started to get serious with not just exercising (which we both enjoy to do anyhoots) but we are really tryin to eat healthier, buy healthier foods, etc. We've never been the greatest at cooking for ourselves, but it's starting NOW!! We like spending the time with eachother while cooking and it's such a great feeling knowing that the end product was our creation and it's actually good for us! What a concept lol. So that's our newest gig: loving ourselves enough to take the time to cook for ourselves and try our hardest to let the MAJORITY of the food that goes in us to be something that's actually going to be of nutritional benefit to us. I say "majority" because let's be real...we aren't setting ridiculous goals of cutting out all sweets (ooohhh how i love cupcakes and other baked delights), red meat, etc. We just realize that those foods need to be very minimum and infrequent.
My next area of love that is lofting around in my life is one that isn't necessarily NEW, but continues to grow and continues to amaze me. Not too hard to guess that this would be talking about reese and the love we share. My parents came down Saturday and the four of us made a day of checking out reception sites in hopes to find one that we could book. Low and behold...we found one!!! Walking around Elements (the site) I just got so excited and as we sat and talked to the wedding coordinator about packages, decorating ideas, and other "big day" plans i was just bubbling up inside with excitement...everything became so REAL...we now had a date, church, and reception site and that all just sank in and i just felt so overwhelmed with joy that YES our wedding IS going to happen...we know when...and we know where...everything else will fall into place. I literally SKIPPED out of the building as we left and grabbed reese's hand i was so overwhelmed with joy hahaha. THEN i got even MORE GREAT news about our wedding day...I received confirmation that my birth-daughter, Tori, will be our flower girl!!! For so long I dreamed that she would be in my future wedding (even before i knew i would be getting married!)...i couldn't think of anything else making the special day THAT much more special. Tori and her family will all be in attendance at our wedding and that brings me more happiness that i can even begin to try and verbalize. In my mother dearest's words.."my cup overfloweth" :)
Finally, today at church was the last segment of the series called "Manly" which has been alot about men and the sociocultural views of what makes a man vs wat GOD has said makes a man. At the end of the POWERFUL service the men were asked to come down to the front to receive a blessing and to affirm that YES they wanted to be men of God...live it walk it breathe it...Not every man got up and took the offer of comin to the front and i didnt want to even look at maurice so that if he went up there it would entirely be HIS choice. Sure enough, he got up...asked me to just wait where i we were sitting...and he made his way into the line that led him to the front. As he stood there in line I looked down on him (we had been sittin on the second balcony) and my heart overflowed with pride and love for him. For a while i continued to sing along with the music, but then i just stopped and started praying. Thanking God for planting the seed in my future husband's heart, and being overfilled with joy that maurice has let that seed grow. I sat there so humbled that God would think so much of maurice and i to have given us each other. And i am so grateful that I have been blessed with the ability to give and receive love and that i have been able to experience here on earth a love so great that it leaves me in awe. The song lyric couldn't be more fitting.."God blessed the broken road that led me straight to you"...there have been so many twists and turns, and ups and downs in my life thus far and all of them have been so worth it bc without it all i would not be right here. right now.
Now it can be hard now and then this whole relationship/marriage business...marriage means LIFE..it means i love him enough to challenge him, grow into him, submit myself to him...and that means he's doin the same for me...and while he takes the whole challenging business pretty well i on the other hand dont always respond with a big smile when he challenges me even when deep down i know right there and then that i should be challenged and i DO need to re-think things/actions..no no no...very often my gut reaction to his challenges (as loving and necessary as they are) and the challenges that come along with making a relationship work is frustration/impatience/resistance bc it OFTEN means I have more to work on. And well frankly, sometimes id rather not admit im imperfect and that i have to tweak things here and there...i mean geez wats wrong with a little ignorant bliss every now and then?! haha. Trust me...after i get over the initial reaction to the challenge i welcome the challenge with open arms bc its these challenges that are helping me to become who God created me to be and they are helping maurice and i become the husband and wife we were created to be. Regardless of how much you love someone, how much u "click", and how "good" of people u are relationships TAKE WORK. We all have a selfish gene in us that we have to fight thru...more often than not we naturally want to satisfy ourselves in the immediate moment rather than embrace challenges that take time but produce a much more magnificent result. I'm just so blessed to have someone who challenges me, not simply to be a pest and difficult, but because he truly loves me enough to help me be greater than i even knew i could be. He sees in me wat i dont and he challenges me with love to bring wat is buried underneath to the surface. And I lovingly do the same for him. Once again, not to prove someone's wrong or point out flaws out of spite etc...simply loving someone so much to help them become who God intended them to be. I can't say it enough...i am SO HUMBLED and SO THANKFUL that God would love maurice and i enough to give us eachother and the gift of genuine love. And im even more thankful that we were given the ability to SEE, APPRECIATE, and RECEIVE the gift of one another.
