Curtain opens. Jessi, being the amazing girlfriend that she is, is at Graeters buying a pint of cookies n cream for her lovely significant other reesaferd, and a pint of choc chip cookie dough for herself. After forking over the greenery and bagging up her goodies she skipped merrily out of the world's greatest ice creamery and hopped into her car, Dolores Merchinski. "Oh I can't WAIT for reesaferd and I to delight in the deliciousness of our individual desserts!" she cheerfully said to herself in a high-pitched and jolly tone. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens. Jessi has just made her joyful entrance into the apartment where her lovely reesaferd awaited for her on the couch doing his usual weekend football routine (watching 2 different games on 2 different flat screens).
"Look what I got us!" Jessi proclaimed as she showed off the pints of ice cream. "You said you wanted cookies n cream so I got you your own pint babe!"
"Wow babe...you're the best!"
(DUH! Jessi thought). Jessi smiles keeping her thoughts to herself, and then places the two pints of sweet lovin in the freezer for later indulgence. Suddenly, some of Jessi's most dearest friends in the whole world arrived at the apartment. It was time to begin to journey to their squeaky friend Cynae's baby shower! Oh how exciting and delightful! Jessi and the lovely ladies of the 317 hopped into the car and began their fun-filled journey. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens. The ladies are in Dolores Merchinski on the drive back from the babylicious baby shower. The ladies are talking about people making messes and not cleanin up after themselves and the irritation this brings. Jessi's cellular device is resounding. Tis Reesaferd calling!
"Well hey there darlin!" Jessi said with a smile
"Hey babe...just so you know..Nicole and I got into a water fight so there might still be water around the apt. Also, I left 1.5 hrs ago to drive back to school but I left my pint of ice cream out so it's probably melted. "
Jessi and Reesaferd continued their conversation for a bit longer and then they parted ways. Jessi couldn't believe what a coincidence it was that she was just venting about the frustration of people leaving messes and not cleaning up after themselves, and then that conversation bw her and the love of her life happened. How silly. Furthermore, Jessi was very happy that atleast reesaferd didn't make a BIG boo boo and eat her ice cream and then leave it out half eaten to waste away.
When Jessi got home she immediately began rescue measures to try and revive the cookies n cream. It wasn't entirely puddled so she performed CPR for approx 4 minutes and then placed the pint back into the freezer for her man to enjoy later. Curtain closes.
Curtain opens. Time has passed now. Jessi has been loving her occassional forbidden rendevous with her cookie dough ice cream. She enjoyed having a few bites at a time so to savor the succulence of the sweet, sweet ice cream. But one day...things changed for the worst. Jessi had just gotten home from a long 12 hr day at the hospital saving lives and changing the outcome, and all she wanted was to delight in a few bites of her forbidden love...the cookie dough ice cream. Jessi would have to deliver Reesaferd to Lexington, KY that same night after a long day of saving lives so he could get back to school and all she needed was a few bites of her ice cream. As she took the cute little pint out of the freezer, Reesaferd, looking innocent as can be, nonchalantly says, "I mixed my left over cookies n cream into what was left of your cookie dough...it tastes pretty good."
"YOU DID WHAT?!?!"
Thunder began to crash and lightning split the sky!
"You mixed YOUR pint of ice cream that YOU left
out to perish into MY perfectly fine and delicious
choc chip cookie dough?!?!?!"
"I don't understand?!?!" Jessi thought as she thrashed through the apt enraged. "What makes you think you can a) mix YOUR sloppy seconds refrozen ice cream into my still fresh tasting pint and b) EAT MY ICE CREAM, PERIOD?!?!?!" Jessi was furious as Reesaferd KNEW what the business was when it came to Jessi and her ice cream.
Reesaferd then fell to his knees and pleaded for forgiveness as he wept at Queen Jessi's beautiful feet. As Jessi gazed down into her lover's eyes she couldn't help but take him back...even after he committed one of the deadliest sins known to mankind. Jessi then helped Reesaferd to his feet. For visualization, this looked like Jessi telling Reesaferd to get his big gorilla self up (Jessi is too fragile, dainty, and beautiful to assist in activities that could potentially cause physical pain). The love birds then embraced. But Jessi will never forget that sunny turned stormy evening when her ice cream was eaten and tainted by the impurities of another.
Let this be a lesson for all. If you have your own ice cream pint and you let it perish in the heat, for then your significant other to revive it so you would still have some to nibble on...DONT...i repeat DONT mix your impure ice cream with her/his innocent ice cream...furthermore, if you are ever at the jessi/reesaferd/nicole/abitha residence and there's ice cream in the freezer, ask who's it is...and if it's jessi's....just shut the fridge and walk away.
THE END
Documentation of the seriousness of ice cream to Jessi found below:
